Brexit

| September 3, 2019 | Reply

On Friday we sent a piece of editorial from The Elite Metropolitan…

You can read it here.

If you hadn’t already guessed by his name (it’s a daft play on the so called ‘metropolitan elite’), he’s our most tongue in cheek editor.

Here are some examples of his previous articles:

Kenny Dalglish was in my dream
Putting my laces through the football of capitalism
Trevor Benjamin and the machine that destroys humans
I’m Drunk

Plus, there was also a lovely ditty about how the Gregg’s Vegan Sausage Roll doesn’t actually exist.

Now, if you are a sane person – as I’m sure you are – you’re probably wondering why I’m explaining something that really should be blatantly obvious…

Well, I’m doing so because after Friday’s email, I received one response essentially complaining about politics in betting emails, and a second which said the following:

Decided you would have a rant to alienate half the population well done!  Will not bother with your service anymore fill in the blank …. off remainer.

“Regards, Brexiteer”

F*** me!!

For those that can’t be arsed to read the EM’s latest article, here is the only part of it that mentions Boris Johnson, politics or Brexit (and it doesn’t actually mention the last thing at all):

I was recently forwarded an email that the prime minister had sent to members of the Conservative Party.

It contained this section:

‘Because you and I know that our country can meet any challenge. 

‘We invented the steam train, split the atom, codified football. 

‘And we created the world’s first chocolate bar. A patriotic fact I indulge in on a daily basis.’

When I first read it I thought it was saying Boris Johnson creates a chocolate bar every day.

Perhaps he does if that’s a euphemism, but it’s setting the bar low to declare that a patriotic fact.

Anyway, BJ can stick his daily chocolate bar up his arse, along with the laws of football, a steam train and, if there’s room left, a split atom.

Because those innovations are nothing compared to the one I’m about to share with you.

Again, I’m sure you’re sane but, just in case, here’s what was going on there…

The EM was saying – with the literary aid of an amusing, tongue in cheek turn of phrase – that Tipstars is a better innovation than chocolate, football, steam trains and split atoms.

Apologies in advance because I don’t want to spoil the magic but he doesn’t ACTUALLY think Tipstars is a better innovation than trains or split atoms…

And, in saying what he said, he also wasn’t making comment on BJ’s politics or Brexit.

A seven point plan for not being a d***

With the above in mind, I thought I’d deviate from betting tips today to pen some general life tips.

In order to not be a d***, remember the following…

  1. Not everything is about Brexit and Brexit is not about everything.
  2. Whether you want to leave or remain does not define you as a person. It is merely an opinion, much like your opinion on what the best flavour of Walkers crisps is (it’s pickled onion).
  3. Merely mentioning a politician’s name does not make something politically loaded. For example, saying “I was watching Boris Johnson make a speech on TV yesterday when I suddenly remembered that I’d run out of hair brushes” does not mean “I hate Boris, all Conservatives and people who voted for Brexit”.
  4. If you are such a sensitive soul that you can’t handle the mere mention of a politician’s name in a broadly non-political newsletter without having a cry, maybe talk to someone. There are lots of good therapists out there.
  5. If somebody does ACTUALLY have a different opinion to you and does ACTUALLY have the temerity to state that opinion, why not listen to it in a calm manner and think about it? I’m not saying change your mind, I’m just saying that maybe you might actually have some common ground and, ultimately, want the same thing (I.E. a better life). Maybe somebody with the opposite opinion to you isn’t necessarily a myopic, treacherous, sexual deviant, but just another human being with a slightly different opinion to you.
  6. Try not to go looking for things to be offended by. 99.9% of the time, the thing you’re watching/reading/listening to isn’t trying to offend you and doesn’t have any unpleasant hidden meanings.
  7. Whether you want to leave, want to remain or couldn’t care less either way, please please please just chill the f*** out.

Right then, now that’s out of the way, let’s get back to the betting.

It’s not like there’s an imminent General Election/Brexit deadline to get people even more worked up now is there?

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Category: Betting Opinion

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